Employer Health Plan Selection

It’s that time of year when we are faced with selecting our health benefits from the list of options provided by our employers. Unfortunately, understanding the difference between the options and the coverage provided is often difficult to unpack and we usually just choose the cheapest or just go with whatever option we selected last year.

There certainly isn’t any right or wrong selection or a blueprint for selecting coverage, however, selecting your healthcare plan should really be a full risk assessment considering many factors other than just pricing.

Here are 10 things you should consider when making your selection:

1. Are you single or married?

Have you considered the cost / coverage variance if you and your spouse are on the same plan or maintain two individual plans?

2. Do you have children?

Have you considered the cost / coverage variance if you cover the children on your plan or the other parent’s plan (or for you all the be on the same plan)?

3. How often do you go to the doctor?

Do you just go for annual check-ups (wellness visits)? If so, these are often free and have no copay

4. Do you have any pre-existing conditions that require Specialist (Non- primary care doc) visits

Do you mind getting referrals each time or would you prefer to just make an appointment directly with the Specialists

5. How much are you willing to pay out in the event of an emergency (MOOP)

This is relatively new with Affordable Care Act – every plan has a Maximum Out of Pocket Benefit (usually a separate one for in Network and Out of Network). This is the maximum amount of money you will have to pay in a given year in the event of a medical emergency / catastrophe.

Note: These are generally much higher for family plans than individual plans

6. Does your job offer a flex spending account?

Some people elect to take the ‘cheaper’ plan option and put a decent amount on their flex spending to cover some of the MOOP in the event of an emergency

7. Do you travel a lot?

If so, does your plan allow for coverage outside of your state / country?

8. Are you “life planning” for this year (e.g., planning to get pregnant)

Will you need to increase the amount you elect for short or long term disability depending on your company’s parental leave policy?

What is the cost of hospital stays or ER visits?

9. Copay vs coinsurance vs deductible

Important concepts to understand and see the impact of your selections:

o Deductible – This is usually the amount you will have to pay out of your pocket before the insurance company will begin making any payments (usually excludes wellness visits)

o Copay – This is the portion you will be required to pay at each visit to your provider (usually differs for PCP or Specialist – also something to consider if you need to see a specialist regularly)

o Coinsurance – This is often for Out of Network Coverage. Usually once the deductible has been paid, there is a percentage split of what your insurer will cover and what you will be responsible for (i.e., 80/20 – insurer will pay 80% and you will be responsible for 20%). This is not a big deal if the amount is $100, but in instances (and more realistically) when it’s $10,000 or $100,000 that could be a game changer. Fortunately, your MOOP will protect you against that. Once you’ve paid your MOOP for a given year, the insurer is responsible for the total remaining reimbursements to the provider. In my opinion this is the biggest benefit the Affordable Care Act provides, and probably explains why most insurers hate it.

10. Last but most, Cost

Taking into account all these factors, what can you actually afford as a deduction considering your other financial obligations, and what might you be willing or unwilling to risk as a result.

I hope this helps … If you have any additional questions, feel free to inbox me. I don’t know that I’ll have all (or any) of the answers but I wanted to help you become more informed when making these decisions that you’ll be locked into for an entire year.

Feel free to share this status so others might benefit from the information... but then again, what do I know

Invisible Man .... I finally see it now

Okay … so I finally finished reading “Invisible Man” (yes, it took me that long) and I take back all previous Ellison slander…. Ralph got bars!    I found myself highlighting quite a few that I thought were pretty sick (well phrased), profound, funny, or simply struck a chord with me.  Bars like:

“Time was as I was, but neither that time nor that “I” are anymore”

“History makes harsh demands of us all.  But they were demands that had to be met if men were to be the masters and not the victims of their times”

“I wanted freedom, not destruction.  It was exhausting, for no matter what the scheme I conceived, there was one constant flaw – myself.  There was no getting around it.  I could no more escape than I could think of my identity…..the two things are involved with each other.  When I discover who I am, I’ll be free.”

“Power doesn’t have to show off.  Power is confident, self-assuring, self-starting and self-stopping, self-warming and self-justifying.  When you have it, you know it”

“It was as though I’d learned suddenly to look around corners; images of past humiliations flickered through my head and I saw that they were more than separate experiences and my experiences were me, and no men, no matter how powerful they became, even if they conquered the world, could take that, or change one single itch, taunt, laugh, cry, scar, ache, rage or pain of it.”

“Somewhere in the audience an old woman’s voice began a plaintive wail; the birth of a sad, unformulated song that died stillborn in a sob”

“Two huge women with spoiled cream complexions”

“A man of striking ugliness; fat, with a bullet-head set on a short neck, with a nose much too wide for its face….”

While reading, it was easy to see that Ellison was more than just an author, but also a poet, a musician, an advocate for people (human rights), and for change.   However, there were several moments when I felt like he made the deliberate effort to display his diversity.   I didn’t need 2 pages worth of a description of grass or random references to different musical pieces or terms.  I thought those to be what I like to call “literary boasting” (© 2014).  Overall though, it was a very good read … once I got past the fluff, it was difficult to put it down…. I can see why it’s considered a classic….. but then again, what do I know!

Social NETWORKING, pt. 2

Obviously for all the reasons listed in my previous blog I love the social aspects of social networking, however, the single thing I love most is the actual NETWORKING!  Social networks, has allowed me to realize that I have built an expansive network of some amazing friends and associates.   Regardless of the topic, there is someone in my network who is a subject matter expert (SME) I can reach out to.   I have reached out to a number of you for your help, advice, guidance, or just general information and you have all been gracious.  A wise man once said “you’re only as successful as your network” (I may have made that quote up.. but, whatever .. it works .. lol) and I am grateful to have you all in mine! 

As a result, I decided to write a few tips on how to network successfully on social networks:

1)      Build your own value/worth

I believe that as humans we have an innate selfish nature and drive (some of us more than others).  As a result, people are more likely to help someone they think they could possibly need to reach back to one day.  If you only portray negativity in your posts, or aren’t showing signs of progressing yourself or positive things that you are doing, it probably weakens your chances of getting a response when you reach out to someone.

2)      Share the wealth

If you have some information that you believe someone can benefit from, even if you can’t (ie: job postings, housing opportunities, info about the latest things happening in certain market segments) SHARE THE INFORMATION.   People on your timeline will remember that you also share information and are more likely willing to share with you.

3)      Do your homework first

Please don’t reach out to your network asking for advice or information that is easily accessible.  Instead, do your own research first.  Show them that you have performed your due diligence and they will be more likely to fill in the piece of the puzzle that you are missing.  Don’t just expect them to hand you a road map to achieve the same level of success that they spent countless hours working hard to attain.

4)       ‘Number four shoulda been number one to me’ (Greg remix):  Networking <> Hook Up

A popular misconception is that networking = hookup!  People expect that because a friend is in a trusted position of authority that entitles them to the access.  As a result, a lot of people are afraid to even let others know where they work, because others are looking for a discount, or a job offer, etc …  When you network, your only expectation should be knowledge… anything extra is an added bonus… don’t expect people to risk their jobs for you.

5)      Yes, they’re your friend .. Yes, they own the business … No, you shouldn’t get a discount

If someone in your network has their own business and is very good at their craft, you should by all means support their business.  That is how our network grows stronger.  However, just because you knew them from elementary school (cue Big Pun) doesn’t entitle you to “take food out of their mouth”.  If you notice a competitor has a cheaper rate for the same service, then feel free to negotiate based on that, but don’t feel entitled or think differently of the friendship if they say no.  It then becomes your choice if you’ll still use them or the competitor.

6)      Say “Thank You!” even if all they were able to do was listen.

There are those few times when we reach out to people and they are unable to help.   Either they didn’t know the information you were looking for, were unable to grant the favor requested, or didn’t provide any additional knowledge to what you already knew.   The fact is, they were willing to listen (or read the email) and for that you should be show gratitude.  It will also make them more likely to help the next time you reach  out or if they happen to gain that information in the future.

7)      Pay it forward

Finally, if someone reaches out to you for information or help, don’t hesitate to  reach out and lend that helping hand!

But then again, what do I know…

SOCIAL networking Pt. 1

Over the course of my 35 years, I have been blessed to have attended some “good schools” and take advantage of some great personal and professional opportunities.  Invariably, as each of those opportunities came to an end (graduation, another opportunity, etc..), you always exchange daps and hugs with everyone and say the obligatory “Make sure you keep in touch!”, “Don’t forget us!”,  and “Here’s my info, hit me up!!”, which I’ve learned over the years was actually just a nice way of saying “Goodbye!”, “It’s been real!”, or “Catch you next lifetime!”.

We’re probably all guilty of this and it’s certainly not intentional, we absolutely intended on keeping in touch, but your good intent is often replaced with trying to cope and balance new challenges, opportunities, and sometimes new  friends (sorry, Drake!) which just made it impossible… until Social Networks!

One of the things I love about social networks is that it has afforded me the opportunity to rekindle and maintain some lost friendships, meet and interact with people who I didn’t get a chance to interact with much (or at all) in those former schools and opportunities, and just keep a finger on the pulse of what’s happening in my friends’ lives when mine sometimes gets too busy to even place a call (but not too busy to check social networks, obviously … nobody’s that busy! … lol).  

Whether, it’s a simple comment on a post (ratchet or uplifting, personal or professional, serious or funny), a quick “hello” through an inbox, or just seeing you post something on your page, I know you’re doing well (or at least well enough … well, most of you … some of you I can see the tears streaming through those motivational memes... lol ), I appreciate you all and I’m happy to have you as “friends”.   

But then again …. What do I know?!!

Be-You-tiful....

Yesterday, a friend of mine wrote a one word status that resonated strongly with me .... she simply wrote: 'Be-You-tiful...'

A status so simple, yet so powerful!

This status, obviously a play on the word beautiful (no reader left behind :-)), reflects on a word I've heard pronounced this way several times, but something about seeing it spelled out like that spoke volumes.

It's a reminder that everyone is beautiful in their own way.  There is a distinct beauty in being you!

We sometimes end up comparing our 'beauty' to others forgetting to take some time to reflect on the beauty that is you....

Be reminded that your beauty isn't just physical, it starts within and whenever you compare it to, or try to be someone else, you're robbing the world of seeing the beauty that is you....

We're all fearfully and wonderfully made! ... and might I say some of you, very wonderfully ... sorry, I digress...

But as you go through your day today and everyday, don't forget to Be-You-tiful!  It looks good on you!!

But then again, what do I know....

Look at God.....

Every so often in various cultures, there are tons of catch phrases that emerge and become so wildly popular and overused that you begin to cringe each time you hear them.  We have all become exhausted with phrases like "ratchet", "turn up", "have a seat (or several)", and "YOLO".  Even at church the catch phrases are there: we hear "But God", the elongated "yeeees", etc ... 

Over the last few months, the one I notice becoming most popular is "Look at God!! ...." and just like all the others, I see and hear it everywhere: hashtags, fb statuses, testimonies, etc and usually by this point the cringing would begin for me, but for some reason I can't get enough of that phrase ... I absolutely love it!

I love it in all the many ways I see see it referenced, whether it's:

A lighthearted praise: "Look there was one pack of strawberry waffles left on the shelf just for me .. Look at God!!" 

An appreciation for the other gender with your friends: "You see all that wagon she draggin?!  .. Look at God!!"

A testimony: "I had no money and didn't know how my bills would get paid, but I prayed and all of a sudden somehow the money was provided .... Look at God!!" 

I started to lend some thought as to why I haven't grown weary of this phrase and I think it's because it's a bit deeper for me ... 

I sometimes argue that one of the reasons Jesus was able to go sinless on earth was because he didn't really have to exercise faith, it was more an exercise of will power.  If he was just in Heaven chillin with God and witnessed all the times they bailed people out and came through for them, then while he's on earth, he KNOWS there's a God, because he's actually seen him... however, he may have still been tempted to turn stones to bread because he's hungry which makes it more willpower in my opinion (but anyway, I've digressed)

I have always been a natural skeptic and relied heavily on logic and sight to believe things.  I need to see it to believe it! ... and it holds firm in most aspects of my life.... and then there's my faith.

As a believer we are taught to rely most heavily on our faith.  This practice is always easiest when things are going extremely well in our lives.  We see the blessings pouring in and we credit God!   However, sometimes it's not as apparent because there are no mind blowing miracles occurring, or worse when things seem to be going "terribly awry" in our lives.  This is when our once unwavering faith starts to get weak and we begin to even doubt His existence... and this is probably because we've never actually physically seen Him.... 

For me personally, I feel like the expression "Look at God!!" is His way of saying, yes Greg, you have actually seen me and you have actually seen me often.... but let me make it a little more plain for you since you are a skeptic, I'm gonna make you see me a lot!  

So now everytime someone is blessed, whether it be major or minor and I see or hear them say "Look at God!!", I smile, and think "aiight God, you got it ... I see you Big Homie!" ..

but then again, what do I know

Be SMART in 2014

Wow, I can't even fathom that 2013 is over already!!   Each year seems to fly by faster than the previous one!  Although 2013 had some bad and ugly in it, those were all far exceeded by the good.   I was able to see a milestone birthday (35), and accomplish just about all my personal and professional goals this year!

While reflecting on the past year, I started to lend some thought as to why this year was better than the previous and of course I recognize that God has His hand in my life and has allowed the blessings to flow in, but there were also several things I did differently that I think we can all adapt that made a major difference with the hopes of us all having an even better 2014:

1) Set SMART goals, NOT Resolutions

SMART is an acronym that stands for "Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, and Timebound".  One of the reasons my 'resolutions' failed in previous years were because they were too open ended, unrealistic, or not within a specific time frame.  Aren't we all guilty of these (ie: i want to save money,  I want to lose weight, I'm going to start going to the gym 7 days a week, I'm gonna do 3 charity events, etc...)

Note: for the remainder of this blog I will use the weight loss example to emphasize my points, primarily because this is probably most of our New Year's Resolution which is probably why the gym is always so full in January .... but hopefully you can draw a line of sight to how this applies to any of your 'resolutions' or goals.

• A) If you don't set a SPECIFIC and MEASURABLE target then you won't be able identify your ultimate goal and track your progress.  For instance, if you don't set a specific number for weight loss, then technically one pound would make you accomplish that goal, but we all know you ain't making no resolution for 1 pound .. lol   

• Additionally, without a specific number, you won't be able to track and measure when you are making progress.  Measuring progress can be as simple as keeping a log to track it as you go along, benchmarking against where you were when you started and identifying things that you couldn't do before (ie: pushups, pullups, run a mile without stopping, etc, or even pictures).  

• These will help you out when you start to get discouraged if you think you are not progressing as fast as you would like, and help to serve as a reminder that you are much further along than when you started.

• B) Ensure your goals are ATTAINABLE, REALISTIC, and TIMEBOUND.  These go hand in hand.  Yes, losing 30 pounds, or going from a sedentary lifestyle to a gym rat 7 days a week is attainable, but not within one month.  Be realistic with yourself.  What is the overall goal you would like to accomplish and by when can you seriously expect to accomplish it.  This doesn't mean to be afraid to challenge yourself with stretch goals, but if the overall goal is to lose 30 pounds set a realistic time frame for accomplishing the goal, and/or set sub milestones ... they say the best way to eat an elephant is one bite at a time ...  but then again, that's gotta work against your weight loss goals... lol 

2) Prioritize Goals

You can't accomplish everything at once.   Set your priorities, put them in order .. Identify which ones are more important, and which ones are easiest to accomplish.  Do the easiest ones first .. that will help build momentum  ... set separate dates to accomplish things and check them off the list one by one

3) Dont do it all at once (Action Plans)

Once you've identified and prioritized your goals, the most important part is creating action plans on how to accomplish them.  It's not good enough to just identify the goal, but also identify the things that need to happen to accomplish them and so on...

Ie:  Lose 30 lbs

• Make better food choices
• Write grocery shopping list
• Only buy items on list
• Only 1 cheat meal per week (Thursday night this week)
•  Go to the gym 3 times a week
• Get gym membership (by Friday)
• Create gym schedule every week to figure out which 3 days I can go and if I need to go Mornings or evenings to ensure I get my 3 days in (Every Sunday)
• Pack gym bag night before

4) Celebrate Success

When you have accomplished some of your goals or milestones, don't forget to celebrate success.  You should be proud of each goal achieved.  Be sure to share it with someone .. or probably all of us via your fb feed or something!

5) Create new Goals! 

Don't be satisfied because you accomplished a few goals... not that you have accomplished those and the momentum is on... set some new ones and accomplish those!

Hopefully this helps and contribute towards us all having a very successful 2014!! ..

But then again, what do I know .... 

Office Rest Room Chronicles ....

This morning as I approached the men's rest room to "drain the main vein", one of my coworkers was exiting.  He said hello, but not in his usually over enthusiastic manner (yeah, he's one of those).  I noticed it was unusual, but I thought nothing of it ... that was until I actually entered the rest room!!  I then  realized that his seemingly dismissive greeting was actually his post rest room walk of shame!  

Good Gawd the atrocity this man committed in there!!!   He had every right to not look me in my eyes! ..   but damn, he coulda atleast given me the John Witherspoon warning from Friday "Dont nobody go in there for 35-45 minutes!!"

I tried to hurriedly use the facility while holding my breath the entire time.  While washing my hands, I happened to notice that my shirt pulled out of my pants and I dont like to look disheveled (most of the time), especially since it wasn't even lunch time yet  ....  so just as I finish adjusting my shirt and pants in the mirror and I'm buckling my belt, in walks another co worker who immediately gets a whiff of the crime scene, furrows his brow, and gives me the look of horror and disdain!!

OH NO, I'VE BEEN FRAMED!!    

At this point, I thought of the uttering the words of Shaggy 'It wasn't me', but instead I just figured he probably wouldnt believe me anyway ... i didnt even try to explain, I just bowed my head and exited in my post rest room walk of shame ... damn

That dude is probably composing his blog post about me right now ... lol .. but then again, what do I know ... 

34 things about me ..... that you'll probably stop reading at 3 or 4

So I had this brilliant idea that I would write a blog that listed 34 things about me.. .. then I realized 34 sure is a lot. So I tried to condense it to 3 to 4 instead .. but that was too few.. lol

Anyway, I'm just gonna write some random stuff about me and stop when i run out or at #34 or when you stop reading .. whichever comes first.....

 I'll start with some of my favorite verses:

1) "The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much" - James ... I'm not exactly sure how a righteous man is defined, but I can attest to having some effectual fervent prayers answered

2) "The Lord is my shepherd I shall not want" - David .. I have an entire blog dedicated to just this .. David's pen game was sick!

3) "... I have come that they may have life and have it more abundantly"- God .. so dope

4) "..You have not because you ask not" - Somewhere in the Bible .. google it

5) "Remind yourself, nobody built like you, you design yourself..." - Jigga .. I never specifically said Bible verses

6) "The only man better than me, is embedded in me ... " - Chris Emdin

7) "Emancipate yourself from mental slavery, none but ourselves can free our minds .." - The late Bob Marley .. pardon me yall .. the great Bob Marley

8)  "Act is the blossom of thought, and joy and suffering are its fruits; thus does a man garner in the sweet and bitter fruitage of his own husbandry" - James Allen .. it all starts with a thought (both the good and bad)

9)  "..Your values is in disarray prioritizing horribly, unhappy with your riches cuz you're piss poor morally" - TI

10)  " Same sword they knight you they gon' good night you with/ ish, that only half if they like you. That aint even the half what they might do/ Dont believe me as Michael See Martin, see Malcolm See Biggie, See Pac, see success and it's outcome See Jesus, See Judas See Caesar, See Brutus See success is like suicide/ if you succeed prepare to be crucified..." - Jigga .. Dont worry about naysayers, it just comes with the territory .. keep grinding!


 Some wacky ideas i suscribe to:

 11) Love is a decision, not a feeling

 12) God only intended to save Noah and his family... he built that boat on the low...

 13) Women often encourage men to be cheaters 

Lol @ all the people that read those and was like "How you figure?!" or "what?! He's not even elaborating?!" ... nope, "aint nobody got time for that!!"

 Some goals for next year:

 14) At least 2 trips - at least one international and Jamaica doesn't count (neither does Canada .. lol).. I gotta get some stamps in my passport

15) Run a 5k .. maybe a 10k (that might be pushing it)

16) Become a Six Sigma Master Black Belt (A Professional Goal .. no its not martial arts)

17) Become a certified PMP (not to be confused with PIMP.. already certified ..LMAO)

18) A 20k pay raise (1 percenters here i come.. lol) - Yes that is realistic ..If your mind can conceive it...

19) Cook more often - This has been my goal for the last 3 years .. smh

20) Participate in at least 3 charitable events - Greg loves da kids and seniors

21) Find at least one new business venture to try .. no I'm not investing in your new record company

Some things I am grateful for (here's where it starts to get mushy)....

22) My parents - These people have been my everything: My biggest fans, my harshest critics, my spiritual, professional, financial, and life role models .. You have always led by example and for that I am grateful

23) My bro - I guess I could have just included you in the above one but I'm tryna come up with 34 of these things and I'm running out.. lol You have always been the dude I have looked up to. You always looked out for me whether it was teaching me the easy way to do math, or beating someone up on my behalf, or even just there to hear all the stuff I could never talk to anyone else about .. 'love you for that no matter what bruh'

24) Friends - Those of you near and far - You have no idea how much I appreciate you guys. So many of you motivate me to keep grinding, keep me grounded, encourage me, laugh with me, and more importantly, laugh at me. (funny always wins) Many of you always tell me how good I am to you, in actuality I am just reflecting what you are to me ... and those of you that think I'm a jerk, the same thing applies ... lol

 25) Associates - Those of you whom I am not that close to, but whether its an online motivational post, or a funny status, or some informative information, or hilarious ignorance .. I am grateful for ya.

26) Opportunities - I am grateful for the many opportunities that have been extended to me. I am also grateful for the new ones I received and been able to take advantage of after the many I have squandered.

27) Life - #nuffsaid

28) Good measure of health - This one is especially important to me. ( I deleted and included this one several times) Many dont know this but in 2005 I was diagnosed with Lupus. I remember a pastor anointing and praying over me that year. I also remember determining in my mind that I wouldnt be defeated by it. Since that year, I have never had any major flare or set back ... I only put this out there to encourage anyone else that may be going through it, your healing starts with you ... if you need someone to chat with, feel free to reach out to me and we can laugh at it together .. somebody needed to hear that

29) God's Impact on my life - please reference all the above

Finally, my prayers:

30) For my family - I pray for continued guidance, continued blessings, and continued protection over you and your life daily

 31) For my friends - I pray for continued success, prosperity, and love (if you believe in it.. lol)

 32) For my haters (everybody always claims to have these) - I pray that whatever I've done (whether real or perceived) that you will forgive me and that we may be able to work through our differences and resolve it

33) For the generation coming up - I pray that you will be able to stay focused and avoid the many distractions.  I also pray that you will not allow your mistakes (cuz you will make several .. we all do) to define or defeat you .. Also know that I'm here if you need someone to talk to.. I got you .. for the low low price of ... lol.. j/k

34) For myself - I pray that I will be a better person daily and that my influences on others will only be positive ... my fortune cookie yesterday said "the nearest way to glory is to strive to be what you wish to be thought to be.." yup, that sums it up

*whew, I'm exhausted*

Peace,
Me

The Poetry of Psalm 23 - David got bars!

Often times I tell people that I believe the 23rd Psalm were some of the illest verses ever written.  The pictures painted within the poetry are so vivid... David had bars son!! lol  Anyway, I once read a blog Toure did where he broke down a Jay-Z verse that he appreciated line by line and explained his interpretation.  I decided to try something similar with the 23rd Psalm .... so here goes:

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. 

- The Psalm starts off crazy! Usually when we think of God, we think of him supplying all our needs.. David takes it a step further still and says that even beyond his needs, God has supplied all his wants!  Clearly either David had a much closer connection to the Big Homie than I, or he didn't 'want' as much as I do.. Lol

He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.  He restoreth my soul: 

- The picture painted here is so serene.  When I read this passage, I picture blue skies, the best manicured lawn, a refreshing still stream of water that it is easy to drink from without having to fight against rushing waves crashing into your face. David takes this picture to the next level by indicating that resting peacefully in the green pastures and drinking from the quiet stream, don't only satisfy his physical refreshment needs;  He lets us know the peaceful refreshment reaches into the deep recesses of his soul.  This leads me to believe the green pastures and quiet streams he speaks of are also metaphors for giving us a snapshot or foretaste of the scene in Heaven.

He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.

-Here David reminds us that if you follow the Shepherd closely, he will keep you on the right path because you represent him... Cool line but blah in comparison to the rest of the psalm.. But no less important

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. 

- At this point, David's swag is on 100 thousand trillion as he diddy bops through difficult times knowing that he is protected by The Big Homie, who is bigger and greater than any trial and tribulation he may endure

Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: 

- This is easily my favorite line of the entire psalm ... A continuation of David's swag (he might be at 400 thousand trillion here) .. Here he in essence says 'you dont want it with the Lord's anointed ...  We will feast on you chumps' .. Dinner is served!

Thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.  Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.

- David finishes up strong by writing words that reminds us 'who Jah bless no man curse'.  David has been ghostwriting for centuries!  A reminder that once you have been anointed and blessed by God, those blessings will follow you for life and those blessings continue even after when u are dwelling with Him in Heaven.. 

Amen - The End

DJ Mr Cee .. Still One of The Greatest!

Over the last 5 or 6 years, if you asked me who my favorite Hip-Hop DJ was, without hesitation I would answer DJ Mr Cee.  If you asked why, I would tell you because he DJ'd for one of my favorite rappers of all time (Big Daddy Kane), he was responsible for bringing Biggie to Puff's office, he is also the only DJ who can kill it when he plays any genre: hip-hop, r&b, reggae, konpa, etc. and not just play the surface or commercial tracks either.  He's not afraid to do parties in the most hood spots.  He also isn't afraid to put his reputation on the line when trying to break new records, expose new artists, and work with people who are not necessarily reputable enough to work with a DJ of his caliber.  He is simply one of the best at it.

However, if you asked me what his real name was, I had no clue..  Is he married?, Does he have any children?, What are his hobbies?, What's his favorite type of music?  I don't know the answer to any of those questions...

Then today when I saw the news and details of his arrest, the Jamaican homophobic side of me was instantly shocked and appalled!!!  "What?!, Mr Cee is a Batty Man?!! .. Say it ain't so!!!"  I was so disappointed to read the news...

Then I thought for a second...  ok, ok it took more than a second but after I gave it more thought I wondered 'Why am I disappointed?' ..  'What has changed?' .. 'Why am I even surprised?' .. Haven't we heard repeatedly over the last 15 years at minimum that a huge percentage of the Hip-hop industry is gay or 'goes both ways'.. Why are we surprised when it is revealed that someone actually is....  Is he no longer one of the best dj's to ever do it?  Did he still not give us Biggie, has he not been an integral part of the Hip-Hop culture for the last 25 years?!  Did he not pay his dues and earn his respect in the game?

I argue that absolutely nothing has changed!!  I mean sure he used poor judgement by his act of 'public lewdness', but c'mon who hasnt had some form of 'inappropriate conduct' in the whip before.. Lmao!! He is a DJ for goodness sake!!  I don't even think that Bishop Eddie Long received the type of ridicule that Mr Cee is getting, and he was a minister .. someone that is expected to uphold moral values. Ultimately, I never knew anything about his personal life before I declared him one of the best at it, and now even though some of his 'dirty laundry' has been exposed, I say "Who Cares?!!"

In fact, when this is all said and done and if this does in fact turn out to be true, while we're all busy ridiculing him, he may be feeling the most relieved he has ever felt in his entire life because he is no longer mentally imprisoned by a dirty laundry cell / glass house that still holds most of us captive.  I mean ours may not be homosexuality,  but what if your husband/boyfriend ever found out the real reason you were voted 'most popular' in school .. or your job finds out about that arrest record that you had sealed, or the church that you love to act Holier than Thou in,  finds out what you're busy doing the other six days of the week .. All I'm saying is, "He that is without sin among you, let him cast the first stone... " - Jesus 

    DJ Mr Cee, keep doing your thing!!!!  Musically that is, I don't care to know anything else .. lol

My New Terrible Diagnosis

Dear family and friends,

Because I love you all, and because of the love you all have shown me, you have helped me build the courage to share with you.  I have received a terrible diagnosis... an incurable disease known as ILikeNiceThings has consumed me and there is no turning back.  This disease tends to flare up all the time, whether its a sick suit, a sick tie, a sick car, and for the most part I have been able to control it ... However, lately it has been plaguing me and rearing its ugly head when I pass the Gucci and Louis Vuitton stores at the Westchester Mall.  Every time I pass the Louis Store,  these shoes keep making me sick!!  I stare at them for minutes at a time, then finally when I muster up the strength to move, and start feeling a little better, I end up by the Gucci store and these damn shoes make me sicker!!  Ladies and gentlemen, you must help me in this cause ... here's how you can help... I have decided that on Sunday March 27th, I am doing a 5k walkathon (or 5 mile whichever is shorter .. I was never good with the metric system).  I am looking for sponsors for my walk to help my cause towards acquiring these shoes.  Please join me in my walk and gather sponsors. too  This is for a good cause... my health depends on it!!  To donate, you can donate via paypal (golewin@gmail.com) or on www.getgregshoes.com (no that website doesnt really exist, but the paypal account does :-) ).  Thanks in advance.



Sickly

A Toast To Love

Just figured I would share my toast with those of you who couldn't make it.

Ladies and Gentlemen:

It is indeed my honor and privilege to propose a toast to the bride and groom

For the benefit of those who don’t know me, my name is Greg Lewin.  and I have been a friend of Christopher’s for over 15 years and indeed it has been an extreme pleasure ….  Well, for him!

Over the many years I have known Chris, he has always been someone who has motivated and inspired me.  If I had to choose one word to describe him, it would be the word success because anyone who knows Chris knows that anything Chris sets out to do, gets done… and not only does it get done, but in most instances it gets done better than its ever been done before.

Case and point, Chris went away for 3 consecutive summers and came back with a Master’s degree from RPI, a highly reputable school.  He disappeared for what felt like a few months and next thing I know, he had a PhD, which I believe was the fastest period of time anybody has ever completed that program.  And those are just a few examples .. the list goes on and on

So when I hear Chris say that next on his agenda is to be a husband, I have no doubts that not only will he be successful in that role, but he very well may be one of the best we’ll ever witness in it!

They say beside every good man is a great woman, and for many of Chris’ successes, there was someone who was by his side for a good portion of the journey.   Someone who would lend an encouraging and comforting word during the difficult or discouraging times, someone who would remind him of his schedule and important meetings, someone who would run errands to the ends of the earth for him so he could focus on writing and completing projects.  Someone who has played an integral role in his success.. and it comes as no surprise that Chris would want that person by his side for the rest of their lives.... That person is none other than the beautiful bride Ebone’.

I’ve heard people say that you have to be careful when naming your children because they very well may live up to the name you give them and when I think of the word Ebony .. I think strong, beautiful, black .. and when I think of the person Ebone’, I think beautiful, strong, black woman, who is also intelligent, sweet, kind, successful, patient, and someone who is perfect for Chris in every way!

Usually when people are looking for their soul mate they look for someone who complements them….  Someone who could be the Yang to their Ying…. And when I see Chris and Ebone’ interact you can feel the love spewing out of them, and I realize that Ebone’ doesn’t just complement Chris …. She completes him!!

And so without any further ado,  please raise your glasses as I propose a toast two souls with but a single thought, two hearts that beat as one ...  To Health, To Happiness, To Prosperity, To Posterity, To Joy, To Love, To Forever!!  Cheers!

Trey Songz ... Bringin' Morals Back??

This morning while driving, I heard the new Trey Songz single on the radio 'I'm Already Taken', and I instantly put on my hater hat.  I thought 'Damn homey, save some of the ladies for the rest of us!! .. this dude is constantly finding new ways every day to get all the women!!'.  Over the last few years, we have witnessed Trey Songz quietly rise from being the average R&amp;B singer to the biggest R&amp;B sensation on the planet.  From young girls to old hags alike, you'd be hard pressed to find a single one that is not crazy about this guy and I knew that this song would only enhance and bolster his position.  Everyone knows that if you ask any woman what they want in a relationship,  they will always say honesty and faithfulness (no, they aren't necessarily the same, but that's another blog), and here goes Mr Songz hitting them in their soft spot with 'I'm Already Taken'.

However, after the effects of my haterade wore off, I thought of a different perspective.  I thought instead that perhaps Trey Songz should be commended for this bold step that he has taken.  In a world where every entertainer and 'role model' (rapper, r&amp;b singer, rock star, athlete, politician, spiritual leaders, etc) show us by both their words and actions that debauchery and polygamy are what define men (and many of us buy into it), Trey Songz has taken a different approach: Trey Songz has publicly declared that monogamy is cool.  He can go to the clubs and women can throw themselves at him and he has no problems  announcing 'I'm Already Taken'.   This isn't the first time he's done it either.. In his video for the song 'Your Side of the Bed', he played the role of a husband whose wife was deployed to war and he was anxiously awaiting her return, which she never did (She died at war and he broke down crying at the door further tugging on these women's heart strings .. Monogamy and a man not afraid to cry?!! .. That bastard!!! ... Hey, how did this hater hat come back on?!.. Lol). Anyway, I've digressed :-) ... How cool is it that the person who has the attention of all the ladies (and all the men that are trying to find out the secret to his super powers), is suggesting that its cool to be a one lady man?  Could Trey Songz (consciously or not) be taking the first step towards bringing morality back into our society?


Undoubtedly, pop culture plays a huge role in influencing all of us (not just our children).  While I do agree that parents ultimately have the responsibility of teaching children right from wrong, it is definitely pop culture that enforces or dissuades those teachings.  Pop culture is the reason our kids want these ridiculous looking clothes, why our grown folk want jewelry, why we bought the 4.6 instead of the 4.0 Range Rover, and why we want those expensive sneakers.. Because whether we admit it or not, somewhere in the back of our minds we believe that if we mimic them even if its ever so slightly we might somehow yield the same results.  So imagine when all our heroes from Michael Jordan, Tiger Woods, Kobe Bryant, Bill Clinton, Shaquille O'neal, and music stars in their songs and videos reinforce that every man cheats.  It almost suggests that it's a prerequisite for greatness and a way of proving your manhood.  It is constantly being imprinted on the minds of our impressionable society (not just men either .. I've even heard women accept less than they deserve by saying things like 'every man cheats, but I'm who he comes home to at night' which then further gives us a license to continue that behavior .. thats yet another blog .. maybe I'll call it 'It's Your Fault').

One thing I have also noticed about recent pop culture, however, is that it lacks originality, so whenever somebody is 'hot', for the next year and a half every other artist is copying the one that is successful, and with Trey Songz being on top imagine if one by one artists continue in this vein and write songs that encourage our young men that it's ok to be faithful and respect our women... What a great thing that would be.  Trey Songz, I commend you for taking the first step towards getting society back on the right track publicly (even if u probably hitting off mad groupies backstage after your shows... There's that damn hater hat again.. Lol).  Good Job.

But then again, what do I know ... That I know nothing.

Message to Lebron...

DON'T PLAY YOURSELF!!!!!


Listen here Mr James!!  As I sit here in anticipation for your hour long special to announce where you're going (which in itself is ridiculous), I just thought I should let you know my stance (since I know you're an avid reader of my blog .. lol).  If you come to NY I will still think you are the best player in the league (ignore by Kobe blog, I was just saying that to get you mad .. lol)... If you stay in Cleveland, that would be very honorable and noble of you, especially after your mom smashed the homey!!  If you go to Chicago, I can respect that decision.  They have some good people at a lot of the positions that could make you a contender and they are still young. .. But, Mr James ... IF YOU DARE GO TO THE MIAMI HEAT .. I will have lost all respect for you.  Congratulations Kobe Bryant, you will no longer be my least favorite player in the league.  How can you go from being the best player in the league (arguably) to attempting to ride another player's coat tails to the championship.  That would essentially be you going from being Jordan to being Tony Kukoc!   Yes it is riding coat tails, because Wade already has a ring.  The announcement is about to start, so I wont continue because I know you need some time to read this before you announce.... but homey, dont embarrass us all .. Make ur momma proud ... oh, oops!  Ha


But then again, what do I know .. that I know nothing!!

Pray It Forward

Hey guys, today while rummaging through my desk looking for some specs so I could run a quarterly report, I stumbled upon a prayer that someone must have forwarded me and I printed it out. Every time I read it, it offers some calmness/soothing of mind and spirit for me. I know a couple of my friends are going through some tough times right now, so I figured I would share it with you guys hoping that someone else may be blessed by it .. Consider it me 'praying it forward'* ..

My prayer for you all:


May today be all you need it to be.

May the peace of God and the freshness of the Holy Spirit rest in your thoughts, rule in your dreams tonight, and conquer all your fears.

May God manifest Himself today in ways you have never experienced.

May your joys be fulfilled, your dreams be closer, and your prayers be answered.

I pray that faith enters a new height for you;

I pray that your territory is enlarged.

I pray for peace, healing, health, happiness, properity, joy, true and undying love for God.

Amen

God promises a safe landing .. not a calm passage.

But then again, what do I know? ... that I know nothing.


*Note: 'Pray it forward' is simply a twist on the expression 'pay it forward'. For those not familiar with the expression:

The expression "pay it forward" is used to describe the concept of asking that a good turn be repaid by having it done to others instead (gotta love wikipedia)

Age is NOT Just a Number!!

For years I have often heard (and I also subscribed to) the notion that age is just a number.  They say 'You are as young as you wanna be!' or 'Age is just a state of mind!', suggesting that age is a fictional monster similar to the Lockness that only exists in people's dreams and imaginations and doesn't deserve any recognition.

Well ladies and gentlemen I'm here to testify today that AGE IS REAL!!! *church dance*

Last night my church had a 4 on 4 basketball tournament which was sponsored and organized by Tasha 'Procrastinator' Brown and The Gem School. 

Sidebar: Gem School is basically similar to 'Charm School' on Vh1, but better.. They teach young ladies how to respect themselves, and it helps them recognize their own worth .. Eh, enough of that .. Maybe Procrastinator will blog about it later (pun intended).

Anyway, back to the tournament.  So, the tournament was categorized into groups, more specifically AGE groups (under 18, 18-25, 25 and over).  This was my first indication that 'I wasn't as young as I wanna be' because I found myself in the oldest group, waaay in the oldest group.. So far into the oldest group that if they had another group above that, I very well may have qualified .. Lol.

Then the games began.  I sat and watched some of the younger groups (some of whom are college graduates with full time jobs) play.  From start to finish (finish for some of them were three or four games later) the games featured lightning quick first steps, jumping ability as though they had pogo sticks in their $150 basketball sneakers (the fact that I point out the price of their sneakers is another indicator... Lol), endurance like they could participate in a triathlon, and highly competitive spirits.

Then came my group, which started with a session of stretching, followed by a conversation/pep talk between the two teams that went something like this (ok guys let's try to make this exciting, but don't over do it .. Some of us have work in the morning .. And some of us have no health insurance .. It's not that serious).  Then the game began.  Molasses slow first steps, leaping ability like 'why aren't u guys jumping? we are jumping!!', and endurance?, well let's just say when the score was tied at 7 we had another discussion about changing game from 16 to 11 but grown man pride wouldn't allow it.  Oh, and let's not forget the game stoppages due to injury.  In the end though, we had a great time and the crowd was into it.

Everyone seemed to have a great time and an enjoyable evening.  Everyone left all smiles.... But some of us didn't wake up with those same smiles.  Over night those smiles turned into grimaces.  I don't even know when it happened.  Somewhere between the fun on the court, the shower when I got home (gotta let u know I didn't go to bed funky), and the 5 hours of sleep, I woke up this morning sore in some places that had me thinking to myself "at what point could I have used that muscle?!!" (No, not That muscle.. Smh.. Lol).  It was at that very moment that I realized that age is not a figment of my imagination but instead a 4 headed monster preying on and devouring unsuspecting victims while robbing them of their youth!!  Age is evil!  No, age is The Devil!!  This morning I stood face to face with The Devil and I think I lost!

The French poet Charles Pierre Baudelaire once wrote 'the greatest trick the devil ever played was convincing the world that he didn't exist'.  I am convinced that must be what he had in mind when he shared that thought.   

I just wanted, no, needed to share this revelation with those of you who have not yet been confronted by this demon and tell you to run while you can ... Save yourselves!!  He got me, I'm finished .. My dear basketball sneakers can now be found hanging on a telephone wire near you..

But then again, The Devil is a liar!!! ... So maybe, just maybe... Eh, maybe not.

But then again what do i know .. That I know nothing!

Note: Some of the events were exaggerated for the effect, but not many.

Happy Father's Day!

Often times when I'm asked 'When are you gonna settle down, get married and have some kids?', I usually brush it off with an answer that will quickly end the convo (ie: if it's church, I will simply say 'whenever The Lord provides' because I know there is no response to that.... lol). Other times i just attribute it to my fear of commitment, or the fact that I've been such a confidant for so many and personally witnessed both the blissfulness of love and the devastating toll it takes on a person after it doesn't work out; and didn't want to allow myself to be so vulnerable to experience such a low point (of course it also means robbing myself of the high point but I'm ok with that). When it really comes down to it though, the truth is I grew up in a home where i witnessed exactly what it takes to be a 'good husband' and 'good father', and I simply don't know if I have what it takes:

My dad aka Ol' skool aka Pops has demonstrated to me that the word father is actually an action word.

It means taking many trips to the park and teaching me how to ride a bike

It means sitting at the table every night and helping me with my homework

It means 'waiting up' with me when I had a project to finish (note: waiting up usually meant snoring on the couch)

It means also 'waiting up' for me when I was out late (see waiting up definition above)

It means leaving work to pick me up from school when I wasn't feeling good

It means carrying me from appointment to appointment

I means saying 'I'm not hungry' when it's really 'I only have enough to buy you one' when u don't have it,

It means living modestly even when you do have it so that you can afford to put your kids through college

It means selling some of your retirement stock so that I could have a down payment on my place.


Basically, every success I have achieved in life, I have only been able to experience because of my dad's incessant acts selflessness and sacrifice... of course he would say God is responsible and naturally I'd agree, but my dad was even there with me to help and guide me through those moments when I even wondered if God was.

So on this Father's Day, I would like to propose a toast *raising glass (sparkling cider of course)*

To the man that always told me he was proud of me.
To the man that still calls me every day, and still says I love you when he hangs up the phone with me.
To the man that always reminds me the last three letters of my name spell the word 'win' (corny, though it may be) whenever I'm experiencing moments of doubt.
To the man who spared nothing to ensure I'd become something....

I thank you, I love you and I salute you .. Happy Father's Day!!

To all the other real fathers out there I extend the toast to you too.. Happy Father's Day!!!

To those who have a father; I celebrate with you

To those who lost their father; I grieve with you

To those who never knew their father; I grieve for you...

To all the men out there with children, I encourage you to be a father because you know that 'my dad can is superman and can do anything' feeling that little kids get?, well, they'll still have it 30+ years later...

But then again, what do I know .. that I know nothing

What Kobe's Missing

While watching the NBA finals over the last couple of weeks, I have been forced to admit something that brings pain to very depths of my soul: Kobe Bryant is the best basketball player on the planet. There, I said it. I won’t even say ‘arguably the best’; this guy is hands down the best player in the game right now. You name it, he’s got it:

Long Range Jump Shot: Check. Damn near pulls up from half court
Mid Range Jump Shot: Check. With or without the glass
Ambidextrous: Check. The guy even puts up floaters with his left hand
Post Up: Check. Sometimes posts up even bigger players
Durability: Check. Played with a broken finger and torn cartilage in his knee
Court Vision: Check. Knows exactly where to be and how to get the right shot
Passing Ability: Check. Not the greatest but can create and dish
Leadership: Check. Sometimes I sit wondering if Phil Jackson somehow got fired because he’s constantly teaching
Defense: Check. All NBA first team in defense for several years
Clutch Performance: Check. Yeah, you already know

Yes, Lebron has better court vision, Ray Allen is a better shooter, he no longer has the leaping ability as some the others in the league, and he may not even be amongst the fastest in the league, but this guy is more complete than them all.

While watching Kobe play, its obvious that he has patterned his game after MJ (no, not the singer), and in some ways is even better than him (fix your face!, This is myyyy blog!! *Poyser voice* - insider). However, I notice that his teams aren’t as dominant as the 90’s Bulls were. Certainly he may have the opportunity to match Jordan’s success (measured in Championships), but the Lakers often struggle and lose to teams that on paper are far inferior. Jordan’s Bulls completely dominated when he played.

I thought long and hard to analyze the difference: his role players are certainly more talented than the role players Jordan had, he has the same coach, the same triangle offense, and obviously the same will to win. So why don’t the Lakers win 70 games? Why do they lose or at least struggle with these sub-par teams? Then it dawned on me, there is one element of Jordan’s game that Kobe didn’t embody: Kobe has not mastered the art of TRASH TALKING.

I know the basketball purists believe that trash talking is sophomoric and you should let your game speak for itself, but I argue that those purists are discounting the psychological effects that trash talking has on an opposing player.

Let’s use these NBA finals as an example. Kobe’s defensive assignment is to guard Rajon Rondo: a player who is quick, gets to the rim at will and can create for other players, but he has no jump shot. The perfect defense is to back off him so he can’t run past you, and force him to be a jump shooter. The first part is easy enough, however, giving him space does not force him to shoot. Rondo is also well aware of his weakness and as a result will not voluntarily shoot the open shot. Instead he will look for a teammate to pass the ball to and reset.

Now lets revisit that scenario, however, instead of Kobe just giving Rondo space, he is also telling him ‘Go ahead take that shot! I’m giving you all that room! Take it, you bum!!’ Rondo still knows that is not his game, but in his mind Kobe has just challenged his psyche and questioned his talent, and it quite possibly may be the first time his talent has ever been questioned (considering all the players in the NBA were probably the star of every team they have been on growing up).

Now imagine if Rondo was able to ignore it the first time and stay within the game plan by not taking the shot and Kobe would then say something like ‘Yeah, you don’t want it! You’re a bum!!’. Then imagine Kobe taking the ball on offense and shooting a three pointed from damn near half court and saying ‘Thats how you shoot a jump shot, you bum!!’.

Imagine the damaging psychological effect this will have. I can almost guarantee that Rondo will take the jump shot next time down the court just for the possibility that it will go in and shut Kobe up and keep his ego in tact. Now, not only does Kobe take you out of your game plan (an added defensive tactic), but he now also has you beaten psychologically and Kobe’s team will dominate. This was a tool Jordan used all the time, and what I believe to be one of his most overlooked ‘talents’.

Hey Kobe!, if you are looking to dominate and not just squeak out wins, you gotta step your trash talk game up!! Work on that over the summer and you’ll probably win the championship for the next 3 or 4 years at least. If you need some help, give me a call, I got u .. Not that Im a great trash talker, but because I've had my psyche damaged enough to know whats effective.. Lol

But Kobe, please be careful, because the only thing more damaging to the psyche than effective trash talk, is an effective two piece to the chin (oh yeah, but you already know that): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gqafrgriot8


But then again , what do I know?

Enjoy It While It Lasts....

Wow, I finally did it!! .. I actually started a blog!! Who woulda thought?!

Well actually, starting a blog is something I have contemplated doing for several months now. A few of my friends write regularly, and they have been encouraging me to follow suit. However, while the thought of creating a blog and expressing my ideas in writing appealed to my creative side (especially since I haven't had many opportunities to write since grad school), I haven't started one until now primarily for one simple reason .... My fear of commitment. I didn't want to start yet another thing that I know I wont finish, but I guess I just couldn't resist the urge. So I decided my first blog should serve as both an introduction and a warning ...

Welcome to my blog!! I'm happy I'm here, but I can't promise I'm here to stay. (wow, sadly that sentence just summed up my life... Lol)


Oh, and I stole the title of my blog from one of my favorite Plato/Socrates dialogues when Socrates was explaining to Plato that a wise man is wise only because he knows that he knows nothing...

#thatisall .. for now